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The General Store opens next week
With wonders beyond your belief.
We have everything “Gilroy’s” your heart could desire
I’ll list them and try to be brief.
We’ve got beer and we’ve got branded glasses
We’ve got a fridge selling interesting cheese;
We’ve got elegant hoodies and all sorts of goodies
And rings so you don’t lose your keys.
We’ve got golf shirts for men and for ladies
We’ve got fleeces to keep out the cold,
We’ve got warm scarves and beanies to fit in-betweenies
Caps and jackets for both young and old.
We’ve got Vincent with home-brewing magic
And all of the stuff that you need -
All the home-brewing gear to make really good beer
It’s a very good hobby indeed.
But the item that I’m most proud of
If you’re hunting a gift, here’s a tip
It’s a bold innovation to stop your frustration
For the gentlemen braaiers – the zip!
What do you do with your apron
When you’re bursting to go to the loo?
It’s a serious crime when you’ve run out of time
And your whatsit can’t find the way through.
Your apron’s thrown over your shoulder
Or precariously clenched in your teeth
It’s a balancing act and it finds its way back
To inhibit your sublime relief!
So, here’s the unique Gilroy apron
The invention the world’s waited for;
Give a long grateful sigh I’ve installed a zip fly
You will suffer the anguish no more!
“UP Yours”
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